Thursday, June 7, 2012

True story

Once you love someone, even after you move on, it will always hurt to see them with someone else.

This is so beautiful

I have scars upon scars upon scars upon freshly rendered flesh on my heart. It is not a pretty thing anymore my heart. It is not ugly Inside … not bitter (yet). It still beats, it still pumps blood and I still live. Isn’t it funny how you live on when your heart is either so full of pain you cry from the agony of it all, or you cease to hurt and become numb? The latter frightens me. To Not feel? I who feel so much, too much. I still cannot find it in my heart to hate the one that freshly broke my heart. I cannot hate the other who comes after me. I hurt too much to find my smile. So if I am not all cheerful and positive, I hope you can forgive me my human-ness and the hurts I must deal with. I see the beauty of love, and I have soul mates. Just not in a Lover like I dreamed of & hoped for. So in my way I still believe in love. But not so much these days for me do I believe in Love and a “Love that time will lay down and be still." No Shining Today.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Dear...everyone I know:

There is always a soft spot in my heart for you- even when you've done wrong, even when you've let me down....even when you couldn't care less.

Friday, April 27, 2012

"Your time is limited, so don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma - which is living with the results of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other’s opinions drown out your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary."

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

"The smallest act of kindness is worth more than the greatest intention."

How in the world, after 2+ years of dating, did the boy I love never once make me a home cooked meal? Man, I feel so stupid.
Not that she didn’t love almost every boy she’d ever met, and not that every boy in the world didn’t totally love her. It was impossible not to. But she wanted someone to love her and shower her with attention the way only a boy who was completely in love with her could. The rare sort of love. True love. The kind of love she’d never had.

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

And so it goes...

So here i am again: confused and let down.

I have been so happy with where my relationship had been going, and then it fell apart right in front of me.

It hurts to let go. Sometimes it seems the harder you try to hold on to something, or someone, the more it wants to get away. You feel like some kind of criminal for having felt, for having wanted. For having wanted to be wanted. It confuses me, because i think that my loving feelings were wrong and it makes you feel so small because it’s so hard to keep it inside when you let it out and it doesn’t come back. You’re left so alone that you can’t explain. Damn, there’s nothing like that, is there?

Maybe he is better off without me, or better yet, I'm better off without him...or any man in general. I'm so grateful to have made such beautiful girlfriends this year. Seriously, there is so much love here that we are taking over Columbus! Forget the drama back home and forget people that talk shit-let them. Forget boys who can't make up their minds and keep you hanging.